life changes, accept it

true friends do all they can
because they understand
life lives and thus continues living
it doesn't stop, back-up, or reverse its doings
we each have our own and are inept to what it brings
embracing curiosity and following a dream
walking on a path to discover what it means
it doesn't matter what direction that path may take
if a true friend will be there when that path breaks
that doesn't mean to sit in the distance and leave me alone
it doesn't mean I only want you to be there when its gone
its not a reason for you to hold a grudge
its a reason for you to truly show your love
for being in the distance might be what it takes, while I try to figure it out on my own
but that doesn't exempt you from wanting to show face or forgetting that my existence is known
for once i find my piece of mind
know that what i was following was for me
know that although my style might change, my guidelines might change,
but if you cant accept it we will never be
the same as we were before i step my foot on the trail in front of me.
for life is but what living we do.
i wasn't born in this world because of you
there's a journey for me to take and it might be long
but just because i'm not there like i used to be does not mean i'm wrong
i do what i do, for me
to ensure my longevity
and as time goes by we only get old
so don't not invite me cuz i'm searching for my gold.
a true friend truly understands, and will be there as i roam the lands
for tis but a true friend that has your back
after years of separation
and its just like that.

By Jessica Thomas

CALL OF DUTY ( a poem i wrote while watching my boyfriend play the game)

Your sentry gun was stolen!
reloding!
are you playing the video game, or is it playing you?
is it only a matter of time before it becomes true?
it's just a game, you know, something fun to do,
but in the end,
is that really true?
switchin back and forth in-beteen guns,
dropping bombs on folks, creating nuclear suns,
perpetuating violence in your time of chill
or subconsciously learning how to REALLY kill
its fun when you're gaming from a seat in your home
but is it really just a way to get you in the zone
to learn on your own, to hate from home, and fall ill to the
perrils and violence to come
to get you in the game
train you to maintain an honest belief in violence mane
rage war on your enemies for a status gain
its a shame
yet you say its just a game.



By Jessica Thomas

A Student of Mine

He was shot in the head on his fucking 18th birthday. And he wasn’t that type of boy. He was a good boy, didn't drink or smoke, he made good grades, was recently accepted to college and would be graduating in June. But one accidental stupid move ruined it all. For two days I have been sitting here listening to the kids cry and walk around depressed, almost as if they are empty inside because of what has happened.
I work here everyday with kids struggling to get through homework because their biggest struggle is making it everyday. So many kids here in my own hometown are suffering from the plight of their neighborhoods, that it has become this game that they are forced to play in everyday, and because they are not awarded the resources to help them combat the negative forces tempting and controlling them and their families everyday, they are forced into this cycle that keeps spinning at the same speed, never stopping but enveloping them deeper and deeper into it as they grow. It’s sickening. How am I supposed to help people when they aren’t given a decent fair shot at survival? I can push and push as much as I can, but it’s never a guarantee. This shit is real, and this is supposed to be fucking AMERICA, the so called freedom land. This shit is bullshit. There is so much fucking hidden racism in laws and in everything else that if you look too hard it makes you want to throw up. It makes me want to throw up. I’m black and as a black woman, no matter how much Athenian I have had or no matter how much college education I receive, I will still be subject to the victimization of this system. But the part that fucks with me the most is that no matter what I do, no matter how much I succeed, the majority of my people will still be enveloped in this mess called life in America. And don’t even get me started on the south. And this is why so many black men consider it an accomplishment to make it to 18 or even 21 alive. And that’s with or without a prison record. I cant imagine what its like to be a mother.

Only in America...

How many of you work with people whose jobs are to oversee your duties, yet they seem to have problems accomplishing their own damn tasks? I DO! and let me tell you America, its the worst. Everyday I come to work prepared to do the tasks set out on my job description, but everyday it seems as if my simple job becomes more and more complicated. WHy? do you ask...well let me tell you....this 27 year old idiot (whom somehow managed to graduate college with a degree in stupidity and get a job reigning over me and my perfectly competent co-workers) just cannot seem to accomplish her own duties....THIS is not because she chooses not to, but it is however, America, because she chooses to chop it up with her amigos in el salvador 24 hours a day 7 days a week in verbal and text form, and spend a good six-eight hours of her work day on facebook's farmville. It doesn't even matter that she has absolutely no idea how to fill out A-G requirements on a transcript when that's the remedial basis of her job description. Or that all she has do all day is pull out students from their classes and come up with an action plan to help them succeed in their classes. PLEASE SOMEBODY, tell me why/how this is possible?? .....only in America, can a person hold a salary and benefits paying position, and not even know how the fuck to do their job....joder!

I am sick, sick, sick of your shit!!!

Ladies, its okay to bitch to you friends about the problems going on with you and your significant other, but dont bitch about how no good he/she is, send a mass text to all of your and his/her friends about how he ate your asshole, cheat on him in mixed company, update your facebook status with comments like, "i'm done with your bitch ass", or "fuck that dirty ass n***a, he done did me dirty for the last time", and then get back with him the next day! YOU just end up looking like a foolish silly ass bitch! Most likely, being your friend we already know all the dumbass shit you and your significant other go through cuz your always bitchin about it, so its probably not a good idea to out your entire relationship and all the intimate details to the entire internet world, and blow up your friends newsfeeds with your stupid ass comments. That's the kind of shit that gets you deleted! So please, PLEASE, don't make yourselves look like silly hoes!...for your sake and mine. And if he's doing so much to cause you to make yourself look silly, leave his ass already. He's CLEARLY no good.
Thanks...
-tellin it Like it is

This is it...

Well, this is it America... I have finally reached my boiling point. I, like many, many, of you, spend countless hours...no....days....inconveniencing myself with niceness. Why oh why?!?!? did my mother and father have to raise me with good manners?! (SIGH) Well, America....since its considered taboo to speak the truth and act on certain instincts....then where better to dish it out than through a blog, get this....ONLINE!!! whew! I feel like a weight has been lifted from my shoulders! No more thinking ridiculous thoughts about people and things in my head. And even better, YOU can hear it too! And living in a society where THE MOST ridiculous shit happens everyday means this well will never run dry. xoxo gossip girl. haha... just kidding.